It's one of Dr. Gregory House's favorite sayings, mentioned in nearly every episode. It's an interesting premise, isn't it? And also a true one. From little white lies ("no, honey, that kilt doesn't make your ass look big") to in-your face doozies, it's human nature to lie. Sometimes the reasons are kind ones (who wants to hear that their ass looks big in their favorite piece of clothing?) and sometimes the reasons are self-serving.
The self-serving lies are always the most interesting to me. Usually they are used by people to boost their self esteem or to improve their appearance to others. A man might boast about the number of sexual conquests he's had, exaggerating the number in an attempt to seem more "manly." Whereas a woman may do the exact opposite, minimizing the number of sexual partners that she's had in an attempt to seem less of a "slut." In reality those are relatively harmless, so long as the lies they're telling (exposure to STDs, for example) aren't going to put another in direct risk.
Sometimes the lies are a little more involved, as if the teller is creating a whole new life for
themselves. And maybe they are. A good liar knows not to give too much detail, to pepper the lies with truth, and the very important motto, KISS: Keep It Simple, Stupid. By following those guidelines, and especially using the anonymity of the internet, some people can maintain the illusion indefinitely -- especially if they're smart.
One thing that every story-teller has to be wary of is coming across the genuine article. If they are claiming to be a doctor, and they meet up with a REAL doctor, they can be found out. The real doctor may not be able to *prove* it, but they may know enough, witness enough, to blow the cover. Often the interactions become more tense, more dramatic, and often the nature of the relationship changes and becomes less friendly. The person who, at the very least, suspects the lies will not want to interact as much, or will be significantly more guarded in future conversations.
Here's the rub: I'm a bit of an exception to the "everyone lies" rule. Oh, sure, I'll tell a white lie here and there, of the nature to spare another's feelings. But you'll never catch me in a self-serving lie. You'll never catch me boasting falsely or trying to make myself appear better with a lie. You won't catch me, because I don't tell them. Quite frankly, my life is dramatic enough, interesting enough, without having to "improve" upon it. I really don't need to add any more "spice." Being the cynic that I am, I assume that everyone is lying to me, at least to some degree, but I also know that the reverse is true: they are assuming that *I* am lying to *them.* That's okay. Eventually the people who know me the best learn to trust me. They know they can bank on my word.
Until then, however, keeping in mind the assumption that I'm lying, most people assume that I *can't* catch *them* in a lie; because they assume that I have no greater knowledge than they do. I mean, think about it: I'm a stay-at-home-mom. My previous positions have been in low-to-mid-level careers. I don't have a specialized degree or a specific area of interest. I have no secret and specialized background that would appear to give me "insider" knowledge of the world. What I DO have is *connections.* I may not seem to be specially learned, but I know people who are! I am also, at the risk of sounding immodest, a very smart person. Not just a "little" smart, but VERY smart. And I have a good bullshit detector. I've also LIVED a fairly full life, no matter that it's been relatively short or apparently limited. In other words, I'm a lot more than I appear, and I'm a lot more than people would have reason to assume.
So what happens when someone tries to convince me of something that they are claiming to have insider knowledge about... when *I* know that what they're saying isn't true? What happens when someone assumes, given my background or the way that I appear, that I will not know that what they're saying is false? Even when I try to explain that I know more than they think, it often doesn't convince them. After all, isn't everyone a liar? What happens is that... well, I let them think that! I don't try to convince them of the truth, because it doesn't matter! Let them believe what they want, let them assume what they will. I'll appear humble and chastised, and even make it seem as if I believe them. Despite the way it seems at times, I really can play nicely.
Just understand that your word will no longer be given merit. That your opinion will be relegated to the same level as the general public (which is not very high). And any bit of respect or headway that you may have made with me is going to be instantly lost. I don't hold a grudge, but I don't forgive easily, either. While it's possible to make nice, it's not possible to reclaim the trust (what little I grant people that I don't know) that has been lost.
So tread lightly when you lie to me. Tread lightly when you boast. And definitely tread lightly when you make veiled threats. Because while *you* may not have the connections to carry out those threats... *I* do. And I won't hesitate to use them to protect me and mine. In other words, when you look at this supposedly harmless soccer mom, this supposedly under-educated "young" woman... be afraid. Be very, very afraid.
